Coming out of Brisbane Airport, we tried to convince the co-driver that he needed to collect $2 from everyone on the bus, and the driver that he needed to swerve across to the other side of the road occasionally to avoid the potholes, that if there was anyone standing by the side of the road, he should stop & pick them up, because there's always room for "just one more" & that he really needed to slow down to 40 kays, open his door, lean out & hark a stream of red juice onto the road. We also tried to explain that we hoped the bus was 4-wheel drive, because that was the best way to drive it into the river to wash it. And also not to be concerned if the tyres are bald.

Parents, a few words of advice. You may find that your child behaves a little differently now. You may find him sitting in the passengers seat of the car at 5 am, waiting to take the early run to the market to pick up hot bread & bananas. Just guide him gently back to bed & explain that he is not on Catering Patrol today. He may also take an interest in the fresh produce section at the supermarket. This is actually quite healthy & should be encouraged. Or your daughter may leap out of bed upon waking, frantically grabbing for a pair of thongs & a roll of toilet paper. Just explain, equally gently, that the toilet is actually inside the house & doesn't need to be flushed using a bucket of water from the 44 gallon drum outside. You may also notice that they may take their shoes off at the door & walk around indoors in bare feet. And if it looks like rain, please expect a dash for the door to zip up the tents. And when you are dropping them off at the shops, expect to hear a "tsst tsst" sound when you get there, indicating that you should stop to let them out. And especially if you have a station wagon, expect that your child will automatically climb in through the tailgate. And if you find your daughter wandering aimlessly around the house trying to look busy, just tell her that the project has finished.

At Brisbane Airport, Jenny went to the toilet & came back to report, "Hey, you can turn on all of the taps at the same time & they all work!" At Nambucca Heads, Max reported that the toilet seat was dry & was quite sure that it couldn't possibly have been flushed properly. And apparently the power stays on all the time here. It's incredible.

A special message for Will's parents: If a dark-skinned woman turns up at your door with a pig under her arm, get him out the back door, fast! We're quite sure he got married at least 4 times.

And finally, for those who need it, the Police report reference is H1424/04.

Thank you to the people with digital cameras who supplied photos for this site. It was a pleasure working with you.

Tomorrow